I’m glad you enjoyed the event. I’d like to take this opportunity to mention that I am great at playing Devil’s Advocate, and am in no way being critical, but rather just voicing my observations and reflections on your writing (Especially since you said “Would really love your take on this.”).

I notice you left off my answers from that panel question. I said two things:
1)As my answer, I said that people should find what really drives them… what they are truly passionate about, and then they can find their voice more easily. Everyone has something that animates them.
2)Upon the question asker received her prize, I announced that she did not only receive a Linked-In mug with a $5 gift certificate… she also received something else. Something pricelsss…. a chance to publically confront her shyness. She got an applause, both for a great question, and for facing her fear.
I think that lady will have a slightly easier time next time.

Shyness is based on perception. I bet you didn’t know that I’m shy. It’s true… depending on circumstance. I manage, and most people think I’m an uber-social ham (and they’re right at times). But, boy, do I suck at breaking the ice. When I show up to lecture, to MC, or even to do a photo shoot or consult (all these places where anywhere from one to many hundreds of people expect me to be the expert), I start the day off with a dry mouth, butterflies in my stomach, and all that other stuff.

What is shyness? A fear of reaching out and communicating in a certain manner, for fear that something bad will happen. Perhaps rejection, or public humiliation, or failure…. all things that account for shyness (as well as fear of public speaking being greater in numbers than fear of Death). But, just as I fear heights, I often throw myself to conquer my fear.

I am an adrenaline junky… I constantly strive to conquer my fear… and anyone can do this. It is a very freeing experience… and most don’t even have to put their lives at risk as I do. Start small. One way to not have to introduce yourself to another person is to stand out

I can’t speak for the other speakers, but I can say we’re all people. Many rockstars have the same issues— if you’re not feeling the butterflies at all before a performance, then you’re not alive. It’s being concerned that keeps us paying attention to detail. It’s a good thing.

The question was how shy people can use Social Media. Social Media is a haven for shy people! It is exactly the tool they need to come out, and communicate! They can hide behind their keyboard. They get to talk to screen names, rather than have to walk up to strangers. They can go to groups of other shy people, and interact more easily– thinking that everyone else is shy. When they speak to a camcorder, or a microphone, they are not speaking to other people in a room, yet hundreds to millions can get the message, and view it as if they were spoken to individually.

All this ties together with what I said in my lecture, about getting out there. Start tweeting with other people and businesses that have the same interests and passions… then it’s easy to communicate with them. Then call them on the phone, as you already know who they are, and should have an easier time communicating then. Then go meet up with them in a tweetup or meetup… that way you’re now going to interact with a friend who has something in common with you. You are hanging out with other like minded individuals that you already have virtually met, and they can introduce you to the other people in the room.

Social Media is the cure for shyness… it lets your bypass the initial introduction. The shy people going to an event could’ve followed the hashtag, seen who’s going, and contacted them… thus already “knowing” someone.

The best advice to overcome shyness is to fight it. Embrace the rush you get from the fear, and go introduce yourself to a stranger. Have a drink if you have to. Go practice at a local event that has nothing to do with your world, so you don’t have to worry about being awkward with someone you already know, or work with.

An answer I gave to another question: How do you get your staff to implement Social Media to be your champion, even i they don’t have time… I said to give them incentive. The same thing applies here. Give yourself goals, and rewards. If I meet 5 new people, I’m getting a frozen yogurt. 20 new friends will get me a massage. 50 will yield that new stero system I wanted…. you know what you want.

Additionally, there are many books and courses out there. There’s Toastmasters, which helps with public speaking, etc….
There’s networking groups.

I always recommend “Win Friends and Influence People.”

Hey,

As the girl who asked the shy question, I just wanted to say that it wasn’t that I was shy myself, I just really suck at public speaking. However, I am glad that all that went down because it gave others out there who are legit too shy to make that first move, and I don’t mind being that person. I have my moments of shyness and moments of outgoingness. And, Ori, very well said! I agree completely, Social Media is not the fear or the problem, but the solution. Take risks, get out there, why? Because everyone you are trying to reach is!

Great seminar, excellent speakers and a great resource for those who are just starting off with their endeavors.

Kiran

Kiran, I didn’t know who Ori was, but I saw him wearing this funny hat at a Tweetup in Miami, so I just went up to him to ask him about the hat..and the rest of the night was full of laughs and fun. They say that most comedians and actors are shy.
By the way, I heard you (slightly:)) on Ori’s talk on couchsurfingradio.com